I love coming here at night and just have a ill spare time for myself or with my coworker… I just love it. Haha.
Makes me happy. Sleeping and waking up the next day to him makes me think about how his the first one in my love life I cherish. Sometimes i feel like I’m dreaming a fantasy. coming over at 3 am just to see me even though his going to see me the next day makes me have butterflies.
Days like this makes me think if I would ever make it to my goal. My expectations are unlimited and high. I put myself In that situation where I am scared to live. Therefore I drink excessivly, mornings, lunch beer, and night beer. To the point I can’t eat anything due to my stomach being sentative. Days where I try to stop, I crash down as today… All I think about since I woke up was and is beer.
Sometimes, I ask to god, non existent, imaginary, person to help me.but.. All he gives me is people to love, share, and be grateful. Especially my best guy friend who we both drives ourselves nuts. I’m happy when I’m with him and open up and not to be scared… Hopefully, someday all this feelings will go away and i will make it all the way… To life.